Being Misunderstood
by Kaylen H.
Most youth today have a shared feeling of being misunderstood. In my experience, the feeling of being misunderstood and not belonging is something I have felt most of my life. I have felt this way not just with my peers but also with my family. Some reasons why I felt this way are because I was never as loud as everyone else, sometimes I also had trouble speaking loud enough for people to hear me, and sometimes it just seemed like we didn’t have anything in common. From what I could see we didn’t listen to the same music, or read the same books, we didn’t have anything to connect on. I tried and mostly failed at connecting and fitting with mostly everyone.
Then on my first day of high school, I met one of my best friends. We were both confused about how to open our lockers. After that we became friends, and I don’t really remember how our group formed. However, I do remember that many of us met in our first-period class and we also had a lot of classes together. When I’m with them, I don't feel so misunderstood, I don't have a sense of not belonging, even though we have a lot of differences. The only way for you to understand someone and for them to understand you is by getting to know and communicating with each other. Even though now I have people who understand me I still sometimes feel misunderstood and like I don't belong. That’s not to say that it is as bad as it was then, it got a lot better, but the feeling is still there. Even though the feelings of being misunderstood and not belonging are still there, I'm still so thankful to the friends I’ve made who made me feel not so alone.
The trick to finding good friends who will help you feel understood is to: try. What I mean is, If you're misunderstood at first you can always try to explain what you mean. A tip for how to keep good friends is to communicate and also listen when they communicate with you. This advice isn’t the best but it’s a way to start. This advice is also sometimes hard to do, but the more you do it the easier it will become. Keep in mind that eventually, you’ll find your people, the people who make you feel like you belong, and who make you feel understood. Another thing that I think is important to remember is that it's okay if you move on from a friendship, even if they once understood you and now they don’t. You’ll find your people again.
It’s important to remember that being misunderstood is sadly a part of life. No one is perfectly understood all the time. Some of us just spend more time being misunderstood. A lot more of us try to force ourselves to belong, but that in some cases causes more damage. So it's better to be yourself and find your people. Until then just know that there are a bunch of us who share the same feeling.
